Bloody Bats

Yes, that's right. There were bats in the apartment again last night. This time my room happened to be the chosen venue for the visit.

It has been so hot here lately that I have been having trouble sleeping at night (how I managed to live in the DR for two years is beyond me right now). Last night I was trying to leave one half of my window open and position the fan so that it would blow cooler air in from outside. I was standing right in front of the window when out of the corner of my eye I thought I saw something wizz by me. I turned around, and sure enough, there was a BAT swooping around my room.

Me: "Aaaahhhhh!!!!!"

*runs out of room and slams door shut*

*begins pacing the apartment thinking: 'f^ckity-f^ck-f^ck! There is a bat in my room. Now I have to go in and open the window or it will never fly out'

*opens bedroom door to check that it hasn't flown out, and to see if it might be able to get out without me re-entering room*

Me to self: 'Aw crap! The window is barely open, the fan is in front of the window, and the shutter is halfway down. I have to go in.'

*thoughts stray to last bat invasion and all the bat crap that was around the room in the morning: 'I don't want bat sh!t all over my stuff! The washing machine is broken...'

Truth be told, I think it was the fear of bat crap all over my room that motivated me to go back in.

Me to self after checking on bat again: 'Wow it is really flying low in there. I don't want to be stuck in a closed room with a swooping bat.'

*runs around apartment opening all doors and windows, and turning on all lights in case bat escapes confines of room when I go in and leave door open*

*grabs umbrella, opens it up just enough to hid underneath it, squats down and shuffles into bedroom, across floor, and to window*

Me to bat: 'Please dear bat do not fly into my umbrella or I will FREAK!!!'

*reaches window, turns off and moves fan, opens both sides of window completely, pulls shutter all the way up*

*grabs pillows and a book in order to camp out in living room, shuffles back to door, and closes it*

Me to self: 'Phew! Made it! I wonder where the bat is?'

*opens door to room: no bat*

First thought: 'Oh my gosh it's flying around in the apartment'

*hurridly puts umbrella up again*

*investigates kitchen: no bat; checks living room: no bat; opens bedroom door again: no bat*

*heaves HUGE sigh of relief, closes all doors and windows, turns off all lights, closes bedroom window*

*spends night sweltering, but at least not sleeping with bats*